or of school forever?
no, i really want to come back to school. in a way, it’s the easy way out. the worst that could happen is that you get bad grades. but you’ll always be surrounded by people, you’ll always be busy, and assignments always have some sort of answer. and you can bullshit
what do i want to go back to school for? i don’t know yet. maybe education, maybe public health, maybe writing, maybe journalism, maybe something entirely different– an M.B.A.?
what will i leave behind at school? ill leave behind ithaca and my family. ill leave flo behind. everything else that ive known for so long.
but about this week so far. on monday, everything went right. flo and i had an impactful good bye that one could reminisce about for years. i made breakfast and went to spanish class. the instructor was funny and i could understand her, even though i made myself out to be a dork very very quickly. a fellow senior sat beside me, named lauren, and she was a cutie. as she got up to talk to the teacher, she gave me a smile. i glanced at her info card and it said that she took danish last year… she must have done DIS! after that class, i sat with ryan (flo’s little) in the nature and culture class, and she gave me a pair of pants and a shirt that flo had borrowed from before. ryan and i got along really well, and laughed along with tantillo’s ostentatious style of teaching, complete with a clip from spongebob squarepants. after that ryan and i walked out together, it was her birthday. i had a break and used it for a nap, then went to my last class, with alice fulton. that was another amazing experience. even though the sole person i know in that class is katherine heiney, who’s kinda cool, alice fulton is incredible. she looks very delicate, but in a hardy, weathered way. she’s also very knowledgeable, (obviously) creative, and funny.
the next day was not so good. lauren, the cutie in spanish class, didn’t show up. i can only guess that she dropped the class, which was wise. oh, i woke up 17 minutes before class and had to run and print out my homework to make it there on time. then i went home and mulled– this isn’t how i should spend my senior year. i must drop a class.– so i mulled, and decided to go the more ‘fun’ route and drop spanish, keep poetry. the next class looked like a bore from the outset, but if i concentrate hard enough, the material is actually fairly interesting. boyd is knowledgeable and enthusiastic, it just looks like he hasn’t shaved for a few months. then i got lunch with eric and vikram, which was a good time. however, im seriously considering telling eric that friends can’t just be back-ups to a girlfriend. that’s just not how it works. the last class wasn’t very much fun (educ), but i think it’ll shape up ok. ill sit next to monica minson, hopefully, which should be dec. chris beyers is also not an incredible friend, although he does ask about my life from time to time. honestly, i find him annoying a lot of the time. he’s another one of those guys who gets so wrapped up in a girl’s arms that you can’t communicate with him anymore.
this last day was in between. in nature and culture, i didn’t sit next to ryan. but i saw her at the library and said hi. in poetry class, i perked up, and was pleasantly surprised by some of the insights of my classmates, dissecting and analyzing some of dana roeser’s poems. i think that’ll be a good learning experience.
ive talked to flo three times or so, including once a few hours ago. she and her family were in the middle of an 8 hour layover, and her brother had a small bowl of cereal for breakfast and a mountain dew for lunch. that’s probs the last time ill talk to flo on the phone for a while. i don’t know who i can talk to about missing flo, and i also don’t know what to do when the flo and brian thing crosses my mind. gah! i am doing a lot of reading though. i just wish there were more people who wanted to hang out and chill.
i did have a fun lunch with alix though. she’s a perky girl and high energy. she can’t come on skifest, but i hope that’s a fun weekend thing too. certainly wasn’t cheap.