What can you regret?
What is the difference between regretting something you did not do and regretting something you did do? So after dating Flo for a while, I asked her if she had ever cheated on my while dating. After pressing her a little, she said that Brian had asked her to kiss him good bye at the end of last semester. And they made out. This was after I slept over, and Isys and I had invited her to lunch. She had sent a text to Isys telling her that the girl who was taking over her room wanted to talk to her about the room, and she wouldn’t be able to make lunch. I don’t think that was true. That might be the most backhanded thing someone has ever done to me. This was after we had a heart to heart about whether or not we were actually dating, a talk that originated with my question: can I trust you with Brian? GUESS I FUCKING CAN’T, EH? Yea.
So, on this note, what else do I regret?
I regret not wrestling freshman and sophomore years of high school.
I regret not going out for more sports/being a spaz with sports at Cornell. I wish I had gone out for sprint football, and not gone out for track during my junior and senior years.
I regret watching so much porn in my young years, and I want to delete that habit asap.
I regret not ordering my classes so I didn’t have to take so many silly CALS credits.
In a sense, my relationships have ended poorly:
With Laurel, I basically gave her the impression that I was more interested in Kristen than her.
With Kristen, I flirted too much with Rebecca. To the point where Kristen couldn’t think about me anymore. Since I didn’t know this, things got really fucked up. She began seeing/fucking one of my friends, Mike. After three and a half years, I called her for the first time last night. I decided to break up with her after going rock climbing, that I couldn’t take that shit anymore.
With Terry, things went haywire after we came back to school. It just really didn’t work out, and I broke up with her at formal– kind of a dick move. When we were all dancing as a big group at a Halloween party, she started making out with some dude right in front of me.
With Flo, the above happened. She ran over from north at 2:30 am in her tights to talk. She said she thinks we’re the real thing, that she’s thought about moving down to Austin, that she can picture me doing the Peace Corps and teaching English, that she could see mom and dad as her in-laws, that this is true love… So that all sounded earnest. But another valid point is that I probs can’t trust her. There’s no way we’re going to be dating after she goes to England, and sees Brian at some point as she travels around with her family. So my question is, do I break up with her tonight, or do I slide it in in a couple of days? Is this going to be a real break up, or a kind of casual one?
There are things that everyone regrets, and they are all important to that person on a personal level. It means you care. It means that you did or would have put lots of energy and yourself into that. It means that you believe your life would be significantly different if you had or had not done that something.
